Q: What would you get if you crossed Santa with a giraffe?
A: St. Neck!

Q: What would you get if you crossed one of Santa's helpers with the King of Rock 'n' Roll?
A: Elfis Presley!

Q: What has fins, a tail, and is mailed to you at Christmas?
A: A Christmas cod!

Q: What did Santa way to his misbehaving reindeer?
A: "Shape up or I'll a gnu crew."

Q: Why don't elves play in the NBA?
A: They just don't measure up!

Q: What would get if you crossed St. Nick with Jon Arbuckle?
A: Santa Clod!

Q: What is Santa's favorite American state?
A: Idaho-ho-ho!

Q: What do Santa's helpers make the day before Christmas?
A: Eight dollars an hour plus time and a half for overtime!

Q: What is a monster's favorite Christmas poem?
A: "The Fright Before Christmas!"

A: What is a ghost's favorite Christmas carol?
A: "We Wish You a Scary Christmas!"

Q: What would you have if Santa brought you a kitten and a puppy?
A: A meowy Christmas and a yappy New Year!

Q: Why was Santa's sick helper reluctant to go to the hospital?
A: Because he didn't have elf insurance!

Q: What has four legs, a hump, and is found at the North Pole?
A: A lost camel!

Q: What goes "Ho-Ho-Ho-Swish"?
A: Santa drilling a jump shot!

Girl 1: "Do you like The Nutcracker Suite?"
Girl 2: "I'm sugarplum crazy about it!"

Q: What happens when Christmas angels meet?
A: They both say, "Halo!"

Q: Where does Christmas come before Thanksgiving?
A: In the dictionary!