Q: Why do cemeteries have fences around them?
A: Because people are dying to get in.

Q: When do ghosts usually appear?
A: Just before someone screams.

Q: What should you say when you meet a ghost?
A: "How do you boo, sir? How do you boo?"

Q: What's a ghost's favorite breakfast?
A: Ghost toasties with booberries.

Q: What's soft, moldy and flies?
A: A spoiled bat.

Q: What did the policeman say when a black widow spider ran down his back?
A: "You're under a vest!"

Q: What happened to the monster that took the five o'clock train home?
A: He had to give it back.

Q: Why did the monster salute his vegetable soup?
A: He looked in his bowl and saw a kernel of corn.

Q: What would you call the ghost of a door-to-door salesman?
A: A dead ringer.

Q: What did Dracula say then he saw a giraffe for the first time?
A: I'd like to get to gnaw you.