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Male Versus Female Jokes

Short Male Versus Female Jokes 2

    Q: Why are men like blenders?
    A: You need one but you're not quite sure why.

    Q: Why is food better than a man?
    A: You don't have to wait an hour for seconds.

    Q: What's a man's idea of helping to make the bed?
    A: He gets out..

    Q: Why are men and parking spots similar?
    A: The good ones are already taken and the ones left are handicapped.

    Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    A: ONE! men will screw anything.

    Q: What do toilet seats, anniversaries and a clitoris have in common?
    A: Men miss them all.

    Q: How do you keep a man interested after marriage?
    A: Wear perfume that smells like beer.

    Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
    A: She starts the sentance with "A man once told me..."

    Q: Why did the woman cross the road?
    A: That's not the point, what's she doing out of the kitchen?

    Q: Did you hear about the guy who finally figured outwomen?
    A: He died laughing before he could tell anybody.

    Q: How many men does it take to change a toilet roll?
    A: We don't know it has never happened.

    Q: Why are there only snowmen and no snowomen?
    A: Because only men are stupid enough to stand out in the snow all Winter.

    Q: Why don't men get Mad Cow disease?
    A: Because men are pigs.

    Q: Why are guys like lawn mowers?
    A: They emit foul odors, are hard to get started, and do not last for long.

    Q: Why are men like laxatives?
    A: They irritate the shit out of you.

    Q: Why did God create man?
    A: Because vibrators don't mow lawns.

    Q: What are two reasons men don't mind their own business?
    A: No mind-No business.

    Q: Why is it hard for a women to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking?
    A: Because those men already have boyfriends.

    Q: How is a man like a snowstorm?
    A: You never know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.

    Q: Why are men given larger brains than dogs?
    A: So they don't hump women's legs at cocktail parties.

    Q: Why can't men get mad cow disease?
    A: Because they're all pigs.

    Q: What is the main difference between men and boys?
    A: Men's toys cost more money.

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